And this made me change two things afterwards
Is this how death feels? I kept asking myself.
I remember my mum screaming and weeping, but I couldn’t tell her I was sorry for making her cry. Probably half conscious at the time.
After that day, October 25, 2021, I wasn’t myself for a long time.
It felt like I had this huge sign on my head saying, hey, look, the girl that was electrocuted and almost died.
But there was no sign and nobody knew asides the four friends I had to tell.
Fine, I made the decision to not tell anyone else.
But two months later, I posted a short video of me receiving oxygen on Whatsapp and I got a reality shock.
Out of the “at least 300 contacts I had on WhatsApp,” only three people replied to ask what happened.
THREE, like 1,2,3, and finish.
Even if I never really thought I was important, the realisation felt like piercing a sewing needle through my chest.
If you talk you die, if you nuh talk you go still die. — A Nigerian pidgin proverb
My mum used to say this all the time.
It means whether you speak up or not, dying is inevitable.
I was one of those people that hated offending people. Most times, I stayed silent to avoid confrontations.
Until I learned how short life was and that nobody cared.
These days I try to speak up more and say what is on my mind politely, without compromising my truth.
When some people die, ground go shake, but other people own be like breeze wey nobody notice.
Another Nigerian Pidgin proverb I tweaked a little.
It means the world hears of some people dying and mourns them, while others pass away like light breeze. Nobody notices because they had no legacy when they were alive and left none behind.
Which one is better? I don’t know about you, but the first option sounds nice.
That’s why I took my writing more seriously.
It’s not because I want to be famous.
I only want my words to live after me, so when I’m in the grave, people will still hear me speak.
Death told me I wasn’t important and that nobody cares, but I hope someday I’ll be loud enough that they have no choice.
Have you had a near-death experience? What did you learn from it?
À plus tard.
© Georgina Odafe